The Rushford Times - A weekly newsletter from Jodi Taylor
Sent on Wednesdays to paid subscribers and Fridays to free subscribers
This week we have:
Jodi Taylor - The Bucket List
The Sands of Time anthology has raised £1452.22 for Scope
Free short story - The Coo of Warning
The St Mary’s Incident Report Competition - ta dah! the winner is Joy Wright with Boudicca’s Breeze
NEW! April audio clip competition - guess the book and characters speaking for your chance to win a signed copy of Out of Time
NEW! Short Story of the Month: The Great St Mary’s Day Out - a chance to discover some of the St Mary’s short stories
There’s plenty to read this week and you can see everything on the blog too. CLICK HERE for the blog.
The Bucket List
I was in the post office today, sending off a truly colossal box, jam-packed full of chocolate eggs. For my two granddaughters. Trust me, there was enough chocolate in that box to guarantee a sugar rush that will last until next Christmas and beyond. How their parents will love me. I think it’s fair to say I won’t be winning the Granny of the year 2026. Again. Nor last year’s either. Apparently, my nomination must have been lost in the post
It was while staring vacantly around the post office, I was impressed by the range of their merchandise these days. I’ve grown accustomed to stationary supplies, writing implements and so forth. And when they branched out into greetings cards, yes, I could see how that was related, but now we have packets of garden seeds - fruit and veg
You can just imagine the scene, can’t you? To be read in a broad Yorkshire accent. ‘Now then, Edna, I’m just off down t’ post office for me brassica seeds.’
And alongside the seeds – perfume! What? There’s even a large notice inviting customers to try before they buy. Leading to the next stage of the conversation, ‘All right James – and while you’re buying your brassicas at the post office can you bring me back some Chanel No 5. Or Opium, if they’ve got some in this week.’
Madness, I tell you. Madness.
Anyway joining the queue, I found myself alongside the greetings card spinner and I noticed a card where two elderly ladies were discussing their Bucket List
I don’t have a Bucket List. I am entirely without a desire to climb Everest, plant a tree, sing at the Albert Hall, cook a meal from which people can walk away afterwards, meet the Dalai Lama, sail the Atlantic in a bucket – you name it, I have absolutely no desire to do it.
And then I had a brilliant idea – I wouldn’t have a Bucket List – I’d have a Phucket List (spelling adjusted so as not to cause offence.) I would make a list of all the things I definitely didn’t want to do and had no intention ever of doing. Ever.
Jodi’s Phucket List.
Housework – I do housework twice a year. The longest day and the shortest day, because I feel very strongly that my house should be clean for Christmas.
Cooking – well, that’s not going to surprise anyone. Cooking seems such a waste of microwaves and easy to open packets.
Drive – there was a family intervention. Apparently, I’m hurting the ones who love me.
Read Thomas Hardy – Yeah, not a chance.
Eat/drink cabbage/garlic/milky tea – Yuk.
Sunbathe – Four minutes and I look like an overcooked tomato.
Respect our leaders – Nope, never going to happen. Not in a million, zillion years. A bunch of inept half-wits whose talents are in no way commensurate with the size of their egos.
Travel – I get carsick, seasick, air sick and train sick. I only need bicycle sick and that’s a full house. I wonder if you can get walking sick – which brings me neatly to my next phucket.
Exercise – my doctor said I should walk for half an hour a day, minimum. I told him my flat is very small and no matter how slowly I walk from my bedroom to my living room it’s not going to take me thirty minutes to get there. I think, he thinks, I live in Blenheim palace.
Grow old gracefully – Yeah, fat chance. My great Aunty Dolly lived in a residential home and every afternoon they gathered around the TV to watch the horse-racing. With a couple of bottles. They had an account with the local bookie and once a week someone went in to settle up. That’s my idea of residential care.
So there we are. I only composed that list twenty minutes ago and look – I’ve ticked off all of them already. For a guaranteed sense of achievement, why not compile your very own Phucket List?
Jodi x
Many thanks to everyone who has purchased The Sands of Time anthology which contains the winning entries from the David Sands writing competition.
So far the book has raised £1452.22 for Scope - here is their message of thanks:
How your donation helps
This year, over 3 million disabled people will turn to Scope for support. It is because of the generous gifts from people like you that we can continue to provide practical and emotional support, through our Helpline, employment support services, family services and Disability Energy Support, making sure that we are there whenever someone needs us.
The book is still available in paperback and ebook formats - CLICK HERE to buy a copy
The winner is….
Thank you so much to everyone who contributed and voted in this competition - it was great fun and there were some excellent entries.
The winner is Joy Wright and they have won a £50 gift card from Bookshop.org
CLICK HERE to enjoy Joy’s winning entry - Boudicca's Breeze
Watch out for a new competition next week.
APRIL - GUESS THE BOOK COMPETITION
Guess the book and characters speaking for your chance to win a signed copy of Out of Time
Put your knowledge of Jodi’s books to the test with our audio clip competition. Listen carefully to a short extract and see if you can identify the book and the characters speaking for a chance to win a signed copy of Out of Time.
Audiobooks are hugely popular among Jodi Taylor fans, bringing her stories to life through distinctive voices, character-driven performances, and immersive narration. For many readers, audiobooks offer the perfect way to enjoy a favourite series while commuting, walking, or relaxing. They make stories more accessible, flexible, and engaging than ever.
Tune in, trust your ears, and see if you can name the book and the characters behind the voices.
The Great St Mary’s Day Out - available in Kindle and Audiobook formats - also included in The Long and Short of It anthology
Astonishingly, Dr Bairstow has declared a holiday. Even more astonishingly – he’s paying for it.
Needless to say, there are strings attached. They have to record the 1601 performance of Hamlet, with Shakespeare himself in the role of the Ghost.
It doesn’t go well, of course. With Dr Bairstow and Mrs Mack turning a simple visit to a street market into a public brawl, Professor Rapson inadvertently stowing away on a vessel bound for the New World, and Shakespeare himself going up in flames, it would seem that Max, of all people, is the only one actually completing the assignment.
Jodi Taylor says…
‘I challenged myself to get the words “Dr Bairstow” and “selfie” in the same
sentence. Challenge accepted!’
Buy now from Bookshop.org - UK USA
'There's a hole in my Phucket', dear Jodi, dear Jodi! Because of which, 'I'm busy doing nothing, happy the 'hole' day through, trying to find lots of things not to do'! You could be in a chocolate factory and then you would have 'too much to do and not enough time to do it'. Eating chocolate of course.
Jodi, you are an absolute inspiration.
Though, like Jacqui, I love me some garlic.
Thank you for so much!