It's Friday - What Can Possibly Go Wrong?
A weekly newsletter from Jodi Taylor
This week we have:
Jodi writes about her funeral
Jodi Taylor Book Recommendation: The Twisted Ones by T Kingfisher💙📚
The Book of the Month is Long Shadows
User Guide for Jodi Taylor Readers on Bluesky It's a great new, ad-free social media platform.
There’s plenty to read this week and you can see everything new on the blog too. CLICK HERE for the blog.
So the other week Hazel and I were talking and just for once it wasn’t all about writing or new books or deadlines. That does happen occasionally.
No - this time we were talking about funerals. And why not?
Hazel was describing the sort of funeral she wanted – a very pared-down affair, apparently. Just a quick, quiet cremation off-site and with a small gathering afterwards. Wasn’t that a good idea? I suddenly realised that wasn’t what I wanted at all.
Just so everyone is aware, I want a full bells and whistles, knees-up affair.
I want an international outpouring of uncontrollable grief.
I want everyone who knew me standing around my open grave and sobbing their hearts out and wishing they had been nicer to me when I was still alive.
I want my coffin to be borne aloft by at least half a dozen young men all bearing a strong resemblance to Hugh Jackman in the climax to Deadpool and Wolverine when they’re battling the Time Ripper and Hugh’s shirt inadvertently explodes.
I want people flinging themselves across my coffin in vain attempts to assuage their anguish.
I want a broken Henry Cavill to read my eulogy.
I want a fly-past – the Red Arrows at least - trailing dramatic black smoke across an apocalyptic sky
I want an inconsolable Matt Damon laying a single red rose across my coffin and telling people the light has departed from his life forever.
I want Meatloaf’s Bat Out of Hell reverberating around the graveyard and echoing off the gravestones. Ha – sleep through that, dead people!
I want Hotel Chocolat to provide my coffin and declare a national day of mourning.
I want fireworks. And every ham roll in the western hemisphere. And sausages. And margaritas. And a week of everyone putting their bins out on the wrong day. Just because we can.
In other words, my funeral should be the event of the decade with jazz, razzamatazz and pizazz, and …
It was at this point that Hazel put the phone down.
love Jodi x
Note from Hazel: Fear not - this is a humorous piece of writing. I can confirm that Jodi is in fine fettle and no funeral plans are required.
The countdown is on. From 23–26 May 2025, Jodiworld Convention descends on Coventry, and it’s shaping up to be our most brilliantly bonkers weekend yet.
If you haven’t booked your membership—now’s the time. There are still places available, but not many!
Discover what’s planned for this weekend of fun, madness and friendship.
Fancy yourself a sci-fi storyteller? Here's your chance to shine.
David Sands, the much-loved character from The Chronicles of St Mary's by Jodi Taylor, becomes a science fiction author. Now it’s your turn to step into his shoes.
Jodi Taylor Book Recommendation: The Twisted Ones by T Kingfisher💙📚
Magically dark and creepy, this is not a book to read alone in the middle of the night. I highly recommend it.
Have you enjoyed this book too?
The Book of the Month for April is Long Shadows
We’re delighted to announce that signed copies of all Jodi’s books are available through the new website.
Signed stock is held for most backlist titles and you can pre-order new titles to collect at events or to be shipped to you when signed. Jodi usually signs books twice a year so there may be a delay in receiving your order. However new releases are usually shipped at least a week before publication date. If you need a book for a specific date please check if stock is available when ordering.
NEW Titles for 2025 are now available for Pre-order. Click on the title to order.
User Guide for Jodi Taylor Readers on Bluesky
If you're a fan of Jodi Taylor and her books, this guide will help you navigate Bluesky, access the Jodi Taylor feed, and get started with the Bluesky Starter Pack.
I was reading this through last night when I had a sudden idea for a story. Suppose - just suppose - elderly ladies like me suddenly start rising from their graves. No, I don't know why either - just go with it. Not only are all their faculties miraculously restored - including some they never had in the first place - but now they are ... frisky. Undead and up for it. No more being ignored by the world. No more having tech explained to them by twelve year olds in the O2 shop. No one and nothing will be safe! Hugh Jackman has had to go into hiding! The world cowers beneath our - sorry, THEIR - sensibly shod feet. Grey Grannies rule! I feel a David Sands story coming on.
For the celts among us I must demand that we have care of you the night before the funeral. You will have the place of honour as we all gather round to tell of your greatness of spirit, your prowess in writing and your sheer animal magnetism that was as a roaring flame to the moths that are Cavil and Damon et al. We will drink the place dry in your memory, we will sing songs of great woe, we will weep till those who look upon us fear the earth will flood. But most importantly we will make damn sure you're late for your funeral......